Cartoonist/Illustrator - Jeff Larson
Minnesota
 This title/claim is not part of a new FDA report but actually are the words offered to me by a pastor in response to a caffeine headache. This man of God told me his wife has a sign in the kitchen that reads, “Coffee is not a drug; it’s a vitamin!” . So woe unto you that would argue with God's chosen one! A man of the cloth (with a little coffee stain down the front)! A shepherd to the flock, and possible coffee addict!  Besides the 'irrefutable' health benefit noted above I would like to share my rationale for the 'use' of coffee.
 So in honor of these practical and one Godly endorsement I would like to thank God for COFFEE. The approved VITAMIN/ ENERGY ELIXER for a sleepy America!
May God bless each of your lives. May your coffee cups overflow (figure of speech), and your breakfast banquet table include a nice variety scones, bear claws, donuts, apple fritters, cheese danishes, and bismarks. Amen and Amen! Jeff (caffinated in the Back Pew) Larson note: Tomorrow I will share my 'deep' theory that donuts are simply a post modern version of manna. 10/6/2020 Lukewarm Coffee 2020 Lukewarm Coffee (LWC) exists in a land between hot and cold where room temperature is king. It is the 'Twilight Zone' of brews. Most LWCs were once a well intended piping hot cup of coffee until forgotten or ignored. They (LWCs) are the 'stale donuts' of the beverage world. And last I checked, neither Starbucks or Dunn Brothers feature lukewarm coffee. GO FIGURE! Not not even for a niche target market of very plain boring people dressed in old sweats, bed hair, and a 2 day beard eating plain white bread from the bag while demanding their LWC.  NO ONE wants lukewarm coffee, and I believe the only acceptable use for it is .. when I have a splitting headache with two Excedrin in my hand and I spot a half a cup of LWC sitting around from this morning to wash down the meds before my head explodes. Of course our Bibles speak often on the topic of coffee (ie Hebrews hahaha.. old joke), and even tackles the specific topic of LWC in Revelations 3:15-16 where the angel of the church of Laodicea speaks out.. “‘I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth (like a cup of lukewarm generic instant decaf coffee with non-dairy creamer and a sweetener substitute). note: If you did not guess, the part in parenthesis was not from 'The Message'.. I added it myself to emphasize my LWC point. But there is a very sobering interpretation of this scripture. Being a LWC believer (even with sweetener added) is not a safe place to be. Will lukewarm get me to Heaven? Well, the whole God spitting me out of His mouth is a pretty clear NO... IMO. God is not amused by half-hearted devotion. In fact God sounds frustrated, dare I say disgusted in Revelations 3:15-16 when we are only playing church.  So I read this passage and look at my life. I am a good guy, no major ( or minor ) crimes, I go to church most every week. I love God, my family, and have good friends making this life good.. for ME, BUT.. am I actually living a lukewarm cup of decaf and a stale donut communion lifestyle? I like to think not, but this is an honest GUT CHECK.
 So in my 'Hot Coffee Analogy' how would an angel of God describe you? Hot, cold, or a 3 day old LWC brew with cream curdling at the top?
I am NOT saying being anything less than the next Billy Graham or Mother Theresa is lukewarm.. but please LET'S NOT be indifferent about the creator of this world or others in need. Frankly being OK is LWC. My bigger concern.. I observe the Church as a whole is so seeker friendly to the point where attendance numbers and a great Sunday Worship 'Show' are their primary measure of spirituality. Our motto is 'Give the people what they want? ' instead of 'give them what they need.' Read John 6:60-63, 66-69 When many of his disciples heard it (Jesus teaching), they said, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?” (The Truth? You can't handle the Truth!) 61 But Jesus, knowing in himself that his disciples were grumbling about this, said to them, “Do you take offense at this? 62 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? 63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. .. 66 After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him (so NOT seeker friendly of Jesus). 67 So Jesus said to the twelve, “Do you want to go away as well?” 68 Simon Peter answered him (with Hot Coffee Faith), “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, 69 and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.” John 6:60-69 Using today's Seeker Friendly church model (with the motto no one get's burned with LWC).. was Jesus a failure? My prayer today is God will bless and speak to each of you. May we listen to His voice and serve Him like never before in a way that is anything but lukewarm. Jeff (aspiring to be a Grande Latte) Larson |
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Back Pew - Draw Close to God
116 pages of cartoons of 'Clean Humor & God's Truth' CRITICS ARE SAYING..
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3/3/2021
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