Cartoonist/Illustrator - Jeff Larson
Minnesota
 Been there, done that. I am a 'good people’ who has bought bad presents. There are just too many ways to go wrong. As a guy, I should see little flags to BAD PRESENTS, but still at times do not even recognize them while waving in the wind (hidden) in plain sight. So here are a few tell tale signs of the infamous bad gift. This is not an exact science BUT I still hope you find this helpful even if it is too late this year. RULE 1 If it says ‘As Seen on TV’ on the box.. beware! It could be a great deal, but it could be the ROMCO 'Pocket' Food Processor for only $19.99… and if you act now you will receive a free set of steak knives that (as demonstrated in the ad) are so sharp they can cut through a Buick like butter! RULE 2 When buying Jewelry, buying in BULK is a bad idea. I once bought my wife this collection of jewelry ( a special one time offer ) that if all the pieces were linked together you use them as chains on your snow tires. My wife was gracious, but.. it is a point of amusement for her today.  RULE 3 A personal gift for your bride should not be manufactured by Black & Decker. Who knew? RULE 4 Diet, Exercise, Weight Loss, or Hair Removal products no matter how much any are needed are cautionary purchases from husbands to wives. RULE 5 Bad presents go both ways.. so don’t you ladies think everything you buy is a gem. Don’t confuse needed with wanted (ie Beano). We guys have feelings too… PULL MY FINGER.  Well so there you have it. Another season of shopping moments of adventure and misadventure are over but it is never too late to learn from this year. In the end, it is the thought that counts, BUT.. a good present is really nifty too... and should be considered a good thought that counts.. Now let's all repeat together the BP Shoppers Prayer.. Oh Lord, grant us SHOPPING MERCIES and DISCERNMENT led by your Spirit. Amen, and amen! May God bless your day, and Christmas season where presents received and given with proper perspective when compared to celebrating the birth of Jesus. May we slow our minds and warm our hearts to this amazing time of year. May God bless us all with the peace that passes all understanding even IF your husband's gift to you boggles the mind and screams.. "He did not go to anywhere near Jareds".
Jeff 12/24/2021 The Christmas Odd Couple Before Felix and Oscar in Neil Simon’s ‘The Odd Couple’ there were the Shepherds and Angels that first Christmas Night. Never has there been a starker contrast between major players in any significant moment in history. Not since Almighty God himself walked through the Garden of Eden with the underdressed for the occassion fig leaf clad Adam & Eve have there been such high society folk mixing with blue collar / red necked joe and joe-ettes.  Think of it… The Angels from the Realms of Glory wing their flight over all the Earth, while the shepherds snack on ‘sheep jerky’ playing pull my finger jokes around the camp fire dressed and smelling like.. sheep. The Angel Choirs sing Hark.. and Glory to the new born king, while.. The Shepherds are in need of a SHEEP-PS (sheep positioning system) just to find this same baby Jesus.
It's safe to say you probably will not celebrate Christmas this year with a shepherd, or angel. But you may be a Baptist sitting next to a self proclaimed Charismatic 'Holy Roller'. Or you may be a sharp dressed senior in suit & tie toting a leather bound red letter KJV bible sitting next to an unshaven Millennial in ripped jeans (on purpose!) with a bible app on his I-Phone using the MSG translation. Come Lord Jesus Come!.. BUT..  the more we are different the more we are the same. Pentecostals, Baptists, Catholics, Lutherans, and more all worshiping the same Jesus those angels and shepherds did 2000+ years ago. Come let us Adore Him! May God bless all you 'odd couples' this Christmas. Jeff  ps - In Minnesota, we have Packer & Viking fans in the same family! Believe me, it is an odd as any couple could be.
12/23/2021 12 Days of Christmas BP StyleI am not sure of the background to the Festive Christmas carol 'The Twelve Days of Christmas' but I believe today I will share 12 Days of Christmas in the Back Pew. So without further delay let me present for your 'cringing' pleasure..  The 12 Days of Christmas in the BP. On the 1st day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 2nd day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Two eyes rolled, A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 3rd day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 4th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Four SUPER BOWLS Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 5th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Five Snowmen Saved Four SUPER BOWLS!, Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 6th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved Four SUPER BOWLS! Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 7th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Seven cows a mooing, Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved Four SUPER BOWLS! Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 8th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Eight months of winter Seven cows a MOOING, Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved Four SUPER BOWLS! Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love sent to me Nine lives a livin’, Eight months a-snowing , Seven cows a MOOING, Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved Four SUPER BOWLS! , Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and .. A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 10th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Ten Commandments keeping, Nine lives a livin’, Eight months a-snowing Seven cows a MOOING, Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved, Four SUPER BOWLS! Three WiseMen, , Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 11th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me Eleven sheep a.. BAAAing, Ten Commandments Keeping, Nine lives a livin’ Eight months a-snowing , Seven cows a MOOING, Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved Four SUPER BOWLS! , Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and, A dog chewing Christmas tree lights.  On the 12th day of Christmas, The Back Pew sent to me
Twelve Spies a Spying, Eleven sheep a.. BAAAing, Ten Commandments Keeping, Nine lives a livin’, Eight months a-snowing Seven cows a MOOING, Six Shooter Worship?, Five Snowmen Saved, Four SUPER BOWLS! Three WiseMen, Two eyes rolled, and A dog chewing Christmas tree lights. So there you have it,, The 12 Days of Christmas in the Back Pew. Beyond this silliness I pray that this Christmas season is a great time with family, friends, and church celebrating the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ. Christmas Blessings Jeff (done singing now) Larson 12/21/2021 It's MY Wonderful Life It's a Wonderful Life is the Christmas movie classic starring Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed where an angel apprentice named Clarence is sent from Heaven to help a desperately frustrated businessman George Bailey by showing him what life would have been like if he had never existed. George in a moment of losing hope whispers a prayer .. "If you are out there God, I need your help." At this point apprentice angel 1st class Clarence enters the story, and soon shows George the impact he is unknowingly having on the lives of those around him... culminating in George realizing .. LIFE is WONDERFUL!  Now the year 2020 (the mother of all bad years) rolled into 2021 with it's never ending COVID variants along with our economy 'infected' with record level inflation can leave us all a little stressed, depressed, and feeling a little hopeless too. So here I am Jeffrey ( George Baily ) Larson my body winces in pain from arthritic joints, and a herniated disc or two, along with my case a surgically repaired knee reminding me my physical prime is in my rear view mirror... on the distant horizon. Also I have my moments that I would describe as 'financially challenged' where my dollars and cents don't always add up or make.. sense. Then, I look in the mirror to see an aging face made for radio while my voice made is more suited for blogging, and my gramr & spellin not 'gooderer' than a 4th grader. And.. There are also times I become oversensitive to what others think of me like a teenage girl with a big ol' honking zit on her nose on prom night. LIFE IS HOPELESS! So like George I whisper a prayer.. "If you are out there God, I need your help." Ok, per usual I embellish MUCH to make my smirky points. THIS IS A WONDERFUL (or as the church brethren would call it a BLESSED) LIFE!
 I know each of our lives have blessings and burdens, and my wonderful life list above may not be real to you, but I pray for each of you no matter your circumstance you face that you putting your faith in the creator of the Universe. May God bless each of you this Christmas season with His Spirit to show you A WONDERFUL LIFE full of hope, promise, and His providence. Jeff (Wonderful Life since age 6) Larson 12/17/2021 Our Conflicted Christmas Ohhh.. you better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why. Santa Claus is coming to Town, He's making a list, checking it twice, gonna find out whose naughty or nice.. Santa Claus is coming to Town, He sees you when your sleeping, he knows when your awake, he knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sake ...  Of course in 2021 many are singing .. Dr Faucci is locking you down. He hears you when you're sneezing, he knows when you are unmasked, he knows if you've been vaxxed or not so get poked for CDC sake ... OK .. back to Santa In these lyrics from Santa Claus is Coming to Town I find a few peculiar spiritual parallels. 1. Santa knows who is good or bad, and will deliver presents accordingly. Omniscient? 2. He also does these deliveries all in one night (dare I say like a thief in the night) giving the illusion of being .. Omnipresent? Of course Santa is only holiday fun while only God is truly omnipresent, omniscient, and omnipotent. So that there be no confusion regarding Christmas, let me summarize.
 So with is in mind, I pray you all can embrace Santa (but not Frosty he's very COLD), the presents, and the secular festivities. I also pray this fun is fit around family, church, with the birth of Jesus with the center this Christmas season.
May God bless and use each of you this Christmas season in ways that are beyond your dreams. Jeff ( Ho Ho Ho ) Larson Soon while consuming eggnog and gingerbread cookies join me as I share the parallels between Rudolph the Red Nosed Reign Deer guiding the delivery of Christmas gifts with Santa AND.. The Holy Spirit guiding us to our Spiritual Gifts from God. <insert awkward eye roll here>. maybe... maybe not 12/15/2021 The Dog who almost ate Baby Jesusnote: It is my Christmas tradition to retell this story most every year. It is like watching a Charlie Brown Christmas, or It's a Wonderful Life.. for dogs. Dateline December 2004: My wife Mary and I have several nativity sets we put on display each Christmas season. The year 2004 was a Christmas season like most all the others, EXCEPT.. our year and a half old dog Baylie (Husky Springer Spaniel mix) still liked to chew on things that were not her designated chew toys. One of those items is my kneaded eraser which I use when I am drawing my cartoons, and it looks like a lump of clay. Well Baylie would sneak it off my desk, and chew it up but never swallow it. Leaving a mangled pile of eraser fragments on the family room floor. I push the crumbs back together, and continue to use it. I know, I know.. Ewwwww!! But she cleans the pencil lead out of it and dog drool seems to be an active agent in making the eraser .. erase. Now in the year 2020 my dog Cooper does the same thing! BUT I DIGRESS.  Back to the Larson Nativity sets. One afternoon in December 2004 my wife and I came home to what looked like a Nativity Mob Kill scene. The wooden cart from the stable was in pieces, a shepherd laying face down on the coffee table, and a baby sheep took a fall off the table and onto the living room carpet. I can’t imagine the horror in eyes of the 3 wise men who traveled so far only to see Baylie walk off with Baby Jesus in the clutches of her jaw. The question remained why?
 Good News: A short time later the 'baby Jesus hostage crisis was over. The son God in ceramic form was returned to his ceramic parents Mary & Joseph who were besides themselves with worry. Baylie was thankful God did not strike her with lightning which was within His right. I mean, .. He is God.
But.. just a couple weeks later Baylie was shocked (literally) when she chewed the lights on our Christmas tree. Coincidence? I think not. Moral of the story. If you really love Jesus don’t risk God revoking your ticket to Heaven just because your nativity sets are low enough for Baby Jesus to be mauled by the family dog. AND.. just like Baylie could not get Jesus in her heart by eating a figurine, neither can any of us have Jesus in our hearts just by going to church. May this Christmas be a peaceful season of adoration and personal faith where Jesus is in our hearts and not just in our nativity sets. Christmas Blessings Jeff 12/6/2021 Coffee Maker Chit Chat Often the coffee maker in the workplace is the common place for socializing. While pouring a cup of caffeinated fuel there is talk about the big football game on Sunday, sharing vacation plans, some are brave enough to discuss politics and/or religion and have lived to tell the tale. (not recommended) In the same way the coffee maker at church is a place where friends catch up on each other's lives while a few may feel compelled to share the height and depths (and some bologna) on weighty spiritual matters.  So imagine the buzz around the coffee maker in HEAVEN.. a little over 2000 years ago when God's plan for ‘saving’ mankind was revealed? SETTING: It was just another day at the 'office' when Larry and Betty meet at 'Heaven's Coffee Maker' for their morning cup of Joe.  Larry the Angel: "Hey Betty, did you hear the latest about the plan the boss has for saving the world?" Betty The Angel: "No, so what's up?" Larry the Angel: "Well rumor has it, Jesus Christ will come to earth as a child born of a virgin in a barn and sleep in a feeding trough for animals. His birth will not be proclaimed to the world, but to .. get this.. shepherds." And a few smart guys from the east. Betty The Angel: "Shepherds? .. right." Larry the Angel: "No really it's true. , and Jesus will be raised by a common carpenter and his wife" and for the next almost 30 years in rural Israel. Betty The Angel: " Good one Larry, and so being a carpenter.. he will then build his father's kingdom." LOL.. Get it?  Larry the Angel: "I know this sounds bizarre, but I heard it all from a very reliable source. And that's not all. Next, Jesus will choose 12 men to assist him as key members of his kingdom movement." Betty The Angel: "You mean like a presidential cabinet of sorts? Made up I imagine of priests, rabbis, maybe a few influential politicians, and some sort of minister of defense would seem reasonable. Larry the Angel: "No, .. they are mostly fishermen." Betty The Angel: "I see.. fishermen... So far we have Jesus born in a barn in obscurity except to shepherds, his critical years of development to be the King and Savior are spent as a carpenter instead of seminary? Larry the Angel: "I know, I know.. but that's not all. Next Jesus will take on the established religious community. He will challenge, and mock their pious rules and their motives.. which of course flies like a politically incorrect Lead Balloon." Betty The Angel: "Well if this is true, then what else could they expect. Now who is it you said you heard this all from? You were not talking to Cliffy from the mail room again were you? I know this is Heaven, but Cliff is full of it." Larry the Angel: "No Betty it wasn't Cliff, it was from a very reliable source. Now be quiet for a minute and let me finish.. then you can let your jaw drop to the floor... because there is more." Betty The Angel: [ Betty motions that she is zipping her lip and smiles.. in silence ]  Larry the Angel: "All of this leads to a final week when the salvation message is realized. Jesus in this unconventional plan lulls the leaders of the day into .. falsely arresting him, mocking him, he is beaten and whipped to the point of death. Then to a jeering crowd he is lead up to a hill where he is crucified as a common criminal while being rejected by the people he came to save... JUST THE WAY HE PLANNED IT ALL ALONG." Larry the Angel: Of course Jesus will not stay dead. He will rise from the dead, but not everyone will witness this.. and so believing in Jesus, and accepting his free gift of salvation will be a matter of choice and it will require a personal faith in things not seen. Betty The Angel: [still silent, Betty stands with her arms crossed] Larry the Angel: "That's it Betty, believe me or not.. that is the God's honest truth (no pun intended)." <pause> "Ok, now you can speak." Betty The Angel: I don't know who put you up to this.. but I would NOT tell these wild tales to anyone else... This is all CRAZY TALK.. and I have better things to do with my time. Next time you learn anymore 'Revelations' .. get it in writing on God's very own BLESSED executive stationary!! Next time.. you should consider your sources before swallowing it all hook line and sinker. Betty walks away shaking her head. Larry refills his coffee cup and heads back to work perplexed why Betty did not believe him.  Ok, it may not have played out like this, but the story of Jesus life from the virgin birth that first Christmas and his 30 years on Earth culminating with his resurrection from the grave is God's beautifully unexpected story of salvation.
So next time at work when you are getting your coffee refill ponder the great news of God's salvation plan that began that first Christmas. ps - Share the Good News! Jeff ( a lot lower than the angels) Larson 12/4/2021 The Christmas Angel 2001 aka The Northwoods Good Samaritan of 2001. This is a story near and dear to my heart that I like to share most every December. THIS WAS NOW 20 YEARS AGO! Back in the December of 2001 on the roads of ice and snow near Hayward Wisconsin a young mom with her preschool children loaded in the family car was heading home to the nearby town of Drummond when along the road she spots an older man with the hood up on his car. This was a typical bitter cold December day, but though she has her young children with her she is impressed to stop and see if she can help. As she pulls over the old man approaches her car. She cautiously locks her doors and rolls down her window slightly to ask if she can help. The old man does not speak, tries to open the door, then reaches inside his coat.. making her all the more uneasy. The old man pulls out a small keyboard from his jacket and plays a pretyped short message explaining he has ALS (Lou Gehrig’s Disease) so he can not speak. He then types needs a ride into town. The young woman opens her car to the old man she does not know and drives him home. This old man was my father Walter Larson, and the young woman was Jen Herricks, and Jen was the the Good Samaritan of Northern Wisconsin 2001. I wonder how many cars drove by before Jen stopped to help. How many macho northwoods guys in their 4x4 trucks drove by too busy to help an old man stranded on a bitter cold winter day? Maybe none, but maybe too many. But no matter, my dad was cared for by someone with a family car, and a kind heart.  Jen later explained to my mom that she thought my dad was an angel. There are a few explanations for this observation but no one before this had described my dad as an angel. A good guy for sure, but an angel? .. hmmm. No so much. Maybe there was an angel standing alongside my dad that cold December day, or the the peace dad demonstrated just months before passing on to Heaven. Either way today this was certainly a divine appointment with an angel named Jen. I love the gospel passage Mt 25:35-40ish “You fed me when I was hungry, you clothed me when I was naked.” Well if the gospels were written today they would also say “you gave me a ride when I was an old man when my car broke down on a winter road in Wisconsin. For when you do these things for the least of my people, you do it for me.” So Jen gives my dad a ride home. He offers her money, she refuses, and they go their separate ways. NICE STORY, BUT IT IS NOT OVER!. A few weeks later my folks receive a Christmas card from Jen wishing and praying the best for them. This was nice touch too, but... THE STORY IS NOT OVER! My dad passed away from his battle with ALS just a couple short months after their December encounter. The funeral was a celebration of the good man my dad was, and his reward in Heaven. 'Irony' or providence has it Jen and her family began attending my mom & dad's church in Cable Wisconsin still not realizing the connection. After a short period of time it became clear to Jen that my mom attends this same church.. and so Jen contacts my mom. This began a friendship that continued until my mom passed away in December 2016.. 15 YEARS later. This friendship continued after Jen's family moving 70 miles away, and my mom later moved 150 miles to the Twin Cities. I mean, c'mon this took this good Samaritan thing too far.. they must have actually become close friends. Correction they were the best of friends. When Jen came to visit my mom it is with hugs and kisses that are reserved normally for family. Her kids called her Grandma Nell, and many of the trips included sleep overs in my mom's little apartment This friendship God has provided Jen those 15 years my mom as a ‘seasoned’ Christian woman to talk and confide in. My mom as I mentioned passed away in December 2016, but you can not take away the blessing of that God orchestrated ride 15 years earlier for my dad, or the wonderful friendship over the next 15 for my mom and for Jen. God is good even through the tough times.  BUT IT IS NOT OVER!. Jen, her husband Todd now serve the Lord in Uganda working with a ministry called 'Woven2gether' serving expecting mothers valuing the born and unborn, becoming strong families while sharing the Gospel.
Thank you Jen & Todd. May God bless and use you both in ways that are beyond your dreams. So as Christmas approaches, please take time to slow down and notice the angel appointments in your life. Blessings Jeff 12/2/2021 Some call me.. TronIn this modern world 'good parents' monitor the time their kids play video games, and the content of those games. Video games can be a sensory overload for young impressionable minds.  After all, staring at a screen for hours clicking on buttons living a virtual existence stimulated by role playing, and first person shooter games while never interacting with a real person is not healthy, wealthy, or wise. And let me add my 2 cents. "Hey video playing KID, turn off your Xbox/Playstation/Nintendo game thingy, get outside breath some air, talk to real people. build something, read a book, do something, ANYTHING that does not involve electronic brain manipulation." Kids these days.  Then I settle in after busy busy day. I'm tired per usual and plop down in my comfy chair and with one hand I turn on my HD TV to watch the evening (all bad all the time) news, followed by 3 hours of channel surfing (200 channels of sameness). I then order pizza delivery from my smartphone with my other hand while tweeting with my 'peeps'. By my side I have my laptop to browse for any nook or cranny of info my overloaded brain may have missed with my smartphone and HD TV. -gasp- My life is becoming like the 1982 movie TRON! where a computer hacker is abducted into the digital world with little chance of escape. My captors are all the above electronic feeds into my life where I prepare to be assymilated. Then I hear tapping on my window, and the above mentioned kid shouts to me.. "Hey OLD MAN, turn off your TV, smartphone, and laptop too. Go outside make some friends that are not on Facebook, and stop tweeting. Build something, read a book, do something, ANYTHING that does not involve electronic brain manipulation". I hate that kid.. and I reply to him.. "GET OFF MY LAWN." But then in my Bible Paul shares words of truth and gentle conviction for me, maybe you, and certainly that video playing kid that is still on my lawn. whatever is true, .. noble, .. right, .. pure, .. lovely, .. admirable, AND if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—I will think about such things. Phil 4:8.  BAM! So Lord I pray not be sucked in by the 24/7 gloom & doom, fake & baked news vortex to sin. I thank you instead for my very REAL family, friends, FAITH, and a church home that desires to serve you. May God bless each of you with your faith journey and that you avoid a life found in a reboot of Tron. I even thank you for that smart mouthed kid who is still on my lawn. - Amen - Jeff (not Tron) Larson  sad confession: I like video games too. Insert PRAYER INTERVENTION here?
|
AuthorThe mutterings on life and faith by cartoonist Jeff Larson Archives
January 2025
Categories
All
|
RSS Feed
|
Back Pew - Draw Close to God
My Book- 116 pages of cartoons of 'Clean Humor & God's Truth' CRITICS ARE SAYING.
|
LAUGHTER is just a click away
|
©2019 Jeff Larson - All Rights Reserved
12/25/2021
0 Comments