Cartoonist/Illustrator - Jeff Larson
Minnesota
 SKOSH.. From the Japanese word "sukoshi," pronounced skosh. That also means a little bit. For example, "I'll have just a skosh of that pie..." Skosh is a great underutilized word, and though I don't recall Skosh ever making it into any translations of the Bible I am sure it can by implied and rest assured it will be in my Back Pew paraphrase. In fact I would like to create a Skosh-Meter to measure small amounts (a skosh) of.. 'stuff' you cannot measure with your standard ruler or scale. For example, Ned crossed through the Red Sea with the nation of Israel in Exodus 14 and the Skosh Meter would indicate with just a Skosh of faith.  or.. when God asks Adam and Eve "Did you eat of the forbidden fruit?" .. They answered in unison.. "Umm.. maybe just a skosh." but.. the Skosh-Meter is waved and.. beep, beep, beep Oh they ate more than a skosh.  Next, how to insert the word 'skosh' in a loving words shared between a husband and wife. Wife: "Honey, are these pants too tight?" Husband: "umm, maybe just a .. skosh tight" Ok on this one, don't wave your Skosh-Meter anywhere near your wife's butt (can I say butt?) You might as well paraphrase President Trump and say "My dear, you look a bit BIGLY for those pants! Then using a SKOSH-METER to measure my love for God Let's try it on God's two greatest commandments. Q: Do I love the lord God with all my heart and soul and mind, and others as myself. A: After a long work day, I would sigh, but still say.. Yes but.. I am not really sure what my trusty SKOSH-METER will say. I want it to be pegged all the way to the right by the words WITH ALL MY HEART, and far from the left side of the skosh-meter by the red letters -just a skosh- and no beeping sounds please  Then again, I really don't want a Skosh-Meter thank you very much. I prefer God's grace and God's Truth better. God will not reject me from Heaven for scoring 67/100 on Heaven's Entrance Exam. He knows I have problems memorizing scriptures and story problems confuse me. I mean missing out on Heaven by 3 lousy points (technically a skosh) is very un-Godlike. *note* To those of you that I worried for a moment.. There is no Entrance Exam. No minimum score.. only grace for the repentant heart. But seriously back to loving God with all your heart soul and mind and others as yourself. These truly are the two greatest commandments and my daily pursuit until someday Heaven. Pursue God with my whole heart (not a skosh) put all (not a skosh) of your hope in Him, and I believe my love cannot help but grow for Him and a natural extension of this love for God is a love for others.  May God bless each of you in your journey to know God, and.. to know God is to love God in ways that are much more than a SKOSH but instead BEYOND YOUR DREAMS.
Blessings Jeff Oh, and if you ever have the need to move a mountain.. I hear just a skosh of faith (mustard seed size for you gardeners) will be enough. 10/29/2020 Is God Boring? 2020That is not a fair question.. I know people may say church is boring, but God? boring? I would not say that, but then look how He stacks up with our 24/7 Entertain me NOW society.  Let's start with SUNDAYS: Football - You can spend the afternoon sitting on the 50 yard line cheering your team as they play their hated rivals on a beautiful fall day doubly blessed with vendors who for a few dollars deliver to you your favorite snacks and beverages. or.. Church - You could spend Sunday sitting on a hard wooden pew in Church singing a hymn or EIGHT, listening to a sermon where the vendors are replaced with ushers who also take your money but there will be no food for you!.. Advantage.. FOOTBALL  Food Glorious Food: Dining Out - The world offers wonderful dining opportunities of all cuisines whether you dine out, drive through, or have your meal delivered right to your door. or.. Church Potluck - Church offers the infamous potluck dinner where there are more ways to fix a macaroni casserole/hotdish than there are stars in the sky. Advantage: DINING OUT  Celebrity/Fame: Reality TV Superstar Kim - has over 20 million twitter followers with the focus on I guess watching Kim be Kim? and Kim is worth millions! or.. Mother Theresa - She ran hospices and homes for people with HIV/AIDS, leprosy and tuberculosis; soup kitchens, dispensaries and mobile clinics; children's and family counselling programs; orphanages, and schools... BUT still no Twitter followers, and no signs of prosperity displayed in her life. So based on Twitter stats and $$.. Advantage: KIM  Truth: God's Word - The bible teaches God's never changing loving truth for mankind, and there is but one God. This Truth not everyone can handle. or.. Secular World View - Our society teaches truth is a relative state of being up for interpretation by progressive thinkers. This world is polytheistic where there are many ways to find god and/or truth. Based on the appearance of inclusiveness (though Col Jessup scares me).. Advantage: SOCIETY  Cosmology v Theology: Cosmology - Cosmology is the science of the origin and development of the universe. With an annual budget for space exploration of around $18 billion in the US, Resources like the images from the Hubble Telescope are used to support their studies. or.. Theology - This is the study of the nature of God and religious belief. Of course there is no annual US budget on Theology. Resources like the bible are used to support these studies. If money means anything.. Advantage: NASA The above examples are a bit over the top but with a thread of 'humanistic truth' (please note humanistic truth is an oxymoron). How can the church compete with the glitz & glam, the look & presentation, and budget found in our 24/7 self serve society? but.. What if part of the next year's $18 billion NASA budget was spent on understanding our creator rather than His creation?
 So in conclusion: God is not boring, but the little box we attempt to put him in is pathetic. Maybe more accurately our attempts to understand God are BORING... weak.
What if there was a spiritual revival of our nation where we pursue God like a spiritual Hubble Telescope? I know one thing.. we would not be bored. May God bless each of us today free from society's buffet for the senses, but instead pursue what is important. To love God and care for others (God's two greatest commandments Mt 22:36-40) is anything but boring! Blessings Jeff 10/27/2020 My INTOLERANT Jesus Hey.. you know what? I can no longer TOLERATE you INTOLERANT Christians. You are un-WOKE, anti-LGBTQ right wingers who are Neanderthal in your treatment of women and her right to.. 'choose'. You are bible thumping, gun owning nut jobs voting blindly Republican every election like lemmings heading off a political cliff. The only progressive thought in your life is considering a Progressive Insurance policy. Ok the above rambling is my 'semi' exaggeration of the average 'progressive' Joe Secular. While I have overstated the views of 'Joe', the negative perception in society and fueled by the media is very real.  This whole INTOLERANCE label is concerning me. I agree when the heart and mind of the church becomes judgmental we are merely legalistic in our words and actions... living breathing CLANGING CYMBALS, 1 Cor 13:1. BUT when we truly love God, we naturally honor Him with obedience in our words and actions. Truth in Love where we do not force our faith on others, BUT in all our ways acknowledge him first. So this all leads me to my INTOLERANT JESUS. Of course Jesus healed the sick, the blind, the lame, and raised the dead. BUT he also lovingly told TRUTH to a compromised world. Jesus admonished his disciples, spoke frankly to the rich young ruler, the woman at the well, and instructed Nicodemus he must be born again. Jesus also shared clearly the ONLY way to Heaven, "I am the way the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except by me". John 14:6. In all his words and actions Jesus was TRUTH IN LOVE. The end result, the world rejected him and Jesus was crucified by basically the same people who were praising him just 5 days earlier.  Let me leave you with the words of my 'INTOLERANT JESUS' to his disciples in John 15:18-25 18 “If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. 19 If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. 20 Remember what I told you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. 21 They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the one who sent me. 22 If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not be guilty of sin; but now they have no excuse for their sin.23 Whoever hates me hates my Father as well. 24 If I had not done among them the works no one else did, they would not be guilty of sin. As it is, they have seen, and yet they have hated both me and my Father. 25 But this is to fulfill what is written in their Law: ‘They hated me without reason.’
I pray we remember these words as encouragement to stand strong for TRUTH, but but but also to remember to be Truth in Love always. Blessings Jeff 10/20/2020 'Dr. Jeff and Mr. HIDE' As I roller coaster through the amusement park of life past the sideshows of a bearded lady, the two headed cow and the tattooed sword swallowing vicar I realize again.. LIFE IS A RIDE. My rollercoaster existence leaves me at times exhilarated while other times ready to BARF. These twists and turns in my life do expose my Dr Jeffrey and Mr. Hide (like a less sinister version of Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde) personality quirks. I am Dr Jeffrey when all is good, but Mr Hide but rises up as my rollercoaster dips and there is a big bend up ahead. AND yes I did mean to say Mr. Hide (not Hyde).. 'Good grief I am cartoonist not a monster’.  My alter ego Mr. Hide unfortunately appears when my "I'm ok facade" is threatened to be exposed by my collection of insecurities, mistakes and bad choices. Better to hide and live to fight another day.. or something like that. Mr. Hide wants others to see me as a success. A man with a career, admired, and a man of status, and dashing good looks. Mr. Hide promotes the illusion that he is confident, funny, never depressed, and has never struggled with substance abuse. Oh there are many other things Mr. Hide hides from others, but you get the idea.  Right now as I type I am in one of times I want to hide. An unfair circumstance mixed in with a dash of my special brand of stumbling/bumbling has me looking for a hiding place. And HEY IT'S 2020 and no better year to want to HIDE. LOL, I guess sharing it in my blog is not a very good hiding place. But while I want to hide, or at least get away I know none of my circumstance surprised God. I am sure He did not slap his forehead and declare.. "Wow, now that's a new one."  Anyways, I choose to put my trust in God. I could quote a ba-zillion verses about God's love for me, but I will keep it simple and share the oft quoted Psalm 23.
1 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, 3 he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Another reason not to hide.. God's people.. 1 Corinthians 12:25-26 25 so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. 26 If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. So today I pray God bless, care, and restore each of you when life seems to have replaced your highs with lows. Remember.. If God is for ME, who can be against ME? Ro 8:31 Jeff (over exposed?) Larson 10/18/2020 I am IRON MAN! Ok fine, you are IRON MAN but what Iron Man are we talking about? In my few years on this Earth I have observed many Iron Mans. In fact there are even IRON MAN CONTESTS where biking, swimming, and running are combined into one big competition. Don't know if that makes someone an iron man or just a very sweaty man. There was also the TIN MAN from the Wizard of Oz, who technically was not Iron man as Tin and Iron are two different grades of metal. And I have even heard rumor of MEN WHO IRON their clothes, but I am not one of those men nor do I aspire to be. Ironing Man is ok to be, but does not a superhero make you. So that eliminates a few HEAVY METAL (insert iron pun here) guys narrowing my list of true Iron Men to three. Let's choose the right Iron Man via the ol' 'Let's make a Deal' selection method. Will it be the IRON MAN behind door#1, door#2, or door#3?
 There you have it, three fine choices for IRON MAN so let's ponder each.. Choosing
 Seriously, none of us of need Tony Stark, and certainly not Ozzy Osbourne to look up to for protection. In stark contrast we do need to be wearing The Full Armor of God.
Not so many years ago I umpired a lot of baseball games and in doing so have been dinged by a foul ball, or two, or what seems like 1000 times. Sometimes I was hit directly on protective gear, but other times finding a gap in between my face mask and chest protector, or an exposed elbow. Even with a quality face mask a foul ball can really jar you. And so much more am I exposed to the flaming arrows of the evil one where the Full Armor of God is very much needed. Now considering those days I leave my house without quieting myself by praying, and/or without taking time to focus on God.. I believe I am left more unprotected like an umpire without a NUT CUP. TMI, TMI So I pray today to encourage each of you to.. Put on the Full Armor of God lest ye be struck by a foul ball wherest thou hurtest most. King James/Back Pew/umpire paraphrase Ephesians 6:11 Blessings Jeff (Iron Man) Larson 10/16/2020 Ants in my Picnic Basket For most everyone living in a city of any size.. RUSH HOUR is a part of your day commute. Bumper to bumper traffic with each car filled with people from all over the city living their own lives in their own neighborhoods, their own way but sharing this joint experience on the roads and rails traveling to and from their jobs. They are EVERYWHERE like ants descending on an unprotected picnic basket each there for their take, then back to home sweet (ant hill) home. But in this moment of rush hour madness I pondered the complexity of our 'ant farm like' society. On just one city road (in a world of countless other roads just as busy as this one), carrying so many drivers and passengers in this great big TERARRIUM called Earth... and I am just ONE of the many ants living in a northern city/ant-hill suburb of Minneapolis Minnesota. This ant hill sits right next to another big ant-hill/city St Paul.  Are you feeling SMALL and INSIGNIFICANT YET and maybe a bit creeped out by this bug analogy? Sorry, my bad. It is mind boggling to grasp in contrast to any colony of ants.. each of our lives are important and significant in God's eyes. So during this rush hour moment with all of God's people, I prayed a broad prayer for everyone so busy in rush hour in all directions for safe journeys, a successful day, blessed and led by God. I took time to ponder the significance of each life in the eyes of God. This moment of prayer was peace, perspective and thanksgiving for me in recognition of all God's people. This was admittedly a strange analogy, but you are reading a blog by Jeff the cartoonist not C.S. Lewis... that sorta rhymes.  My prayer today if for all of you out there. May the realization of your significance to God, and the blessings of God be in ways that are truly beyond your dreams.
and.. may He keep you safe from those who would attempt to step on your ant hill, and that kid with the magnifying glass trying to burn you up. But I digress Jeff (Ants in the Back Pew) Larson 10/13/2020 TEETH.. something to chew on For the sake of today's blog let me share a story back when I assigned sports officials for local sporting events. Dateline, 9/18/2013 I have a confession to make. Yesterday I did NOT brush my teeth. Gross? .. yes kinda gross, I agree with you. You see I work from home assigning sports officials for area sporting events. In the month of September I cover sports for everything from football, soccer, volleyball, baseball, and basketball.  So yesterday was especially busy and I was on the phone and/or my computer from 7am (like an assignor telemarketer) assigning open games, and updating the ongoing changes to our schedules. This continued until 4pm when I left home to officiate two soccer games. End result was another VERY busy day where I did not stop EXCEPT to eat a quick lunch AND so.. I forgot to brush my teeth. It was not a great feeling.. as my teeth reminded me when I was reffing soccer at about 5pm that they did not get any TLC today.  Good news my teeth will not rot away in a day.. and besides them not feeling clean, and breathe that was less than fresh... I will be fine. Now if I continue to neglect my teeth I will suffer with cavities, gum problems, infections, all resulting in losing my teeth and then on to my future eating a truly pureed diet featuring oatmeal and pudding. Hmmm, now let me do an AWKWARD segue to the land of the spiritual? Just like neglecting my teeth.. if I miss spending time with God my life begins to get messy. My perspective is less than fresh and if perspective could smell like 2 hour old onion infused bad breath. So I can go a day or two without slowing down for time with God with life being for the most part busy as usual, BUT the longer away the more I notice a difference. Maybe others notice, maybe not.. but definitely I notice.  THE MORAL OF TODAY'S BLOG?
 May God bless each of you with good dental health supported with dentists, orthodontists, and insurance as needed.. AND.. don't forget to FLOSS! Also may you also be blessed with a personal relationship with our Heavenly Father. May you realize the comfort of His perspective and provision in your lives that is fresh and never stale. Jeff (brushing in the back pew) Larson More 'minty fresh' scriptures below
10/12/2020 Note to Self… I find that my life is filled with ‘notes to self’ moments where I need to make note to self regarding the often obvious issues of the day that I need to address. For example ...
With these two very real world common sense NOTES TO SELF.. let me continue on this theme. Old Testament.. NOTES Adam.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Learn your Times Tables’ Adam.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘a rib in exchange for pretty woman is a sweet deal’ Cain.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘God’s ways are not PETA friendly’ Mr. Unicorn.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Don’t mix up RSVPs with the daily junk mail’ Abraham.. NOTE TO SELF.. 'Wear comfortable underwear.' Abraham.. NOTE TO SELF.. Do not confuse ‘My wife and my sister.’ Abraham.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Do not confuse wife with maidservant.’ Bob the Bull.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Beware of the Jew wearing the 'You Can't Grill it til you Kill It." t-shirt
Sam the Sheep.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Always remember to FLOSS’ Spy #1.. NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Don’t hide out with prostitutes’ Guard Tower Sentry.. ‘Don’t Trash Talk those who are in Marching Bands’ Goliath – NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Beware of boys with sling shots that smell like sheep’ Solomon – NOTE TO SELF.. ‘It is good to be married’ Benny the Baal Priest- NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Jewish Prophets tend to be Smart Alecs’ Shadrach – NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Hot.. is the new Cool’ Larry the Lion- NOTE TO SELF.. ‘Don’t pig out at the salad bar, and have 3 large pops on all you can eat prophet night at the Old Testament Buffet.'
There you have it.. NOTES TO SELF from the Old Testament. Just a little fun with great stories from our Bibles.
My prayer for each of you today is to enjoy this life God has blessed us with (even in the year 2020). To love God with all my heart soul and mind and others as myself (Matthew 22:35–40, Mark 12:28–34, and Luke 10:27a.).. in all that I do. and Trust in the Lord will all my heart and lean not unto my own understanding, in all my ways acknowledge Him and He will direct my paths.. Then by comparison .. the rest is trivial pursuit. Blessings Jeff 10/9/2020 The Evolution of.. EVOLUTION 2020 While I do not believe in any monkey ancestry kind of evolution I do believe life certainly evolves. Rest assured Ancestry.Com will not find any chimps, gorillas, or Orangutans in your family roots. Let me share 'my' scientific findings from my exhaustive study here at the Back Pew Institute for Common Sense. Don't roll your eyes at me.. this is SCIENCE!  Exhibit A (Valentines Day) THEN: On February 14, 1984 I bought my wife an engagement ring, flowers and proposed marriage. Good news for me Mary was very excited about spending the rest of her life with ME! Til death do us part.. thank you very much. NOW: On February 13th 2016 my wife informed me she was going to pick up some flowers for my 86 year old mom for Valentines Day. I replied "Great, and while you're at it, pick up something nice for yourself from me.. cuz I like ya."  Exhibit B (Romance) THEN: Mary and I were married in August 1984. The newlywed excitement of starting our lives together, holding hands, the excitement of the kiss, and all the other 'fringe benefits' of being married were truly wonderful. NOW: Just the few years ago I remember trying to kiss my wife Mary on the lips before I headed out the door to work. But she turned her head at the last moment offering me only to her cheek to kiss. So I said to my bride "I noticed you turned away", and she replied matter of factly.. "yes I did not want you to wreck my lips." Wreck her lips? I was her husband wanting a simple kiss, not a zombie wanting to eat her lips.  Exhibit C (Sports) THEN: March Madness Year 1 was a simple game where dunking was not possible as the hunched over Neanderthal players had little to no vertical jump compounded by using a ball which technically was a medium sized boulder. NOW: The game now is fast, the players tall and athletic, the action is high flying, and the courts are free of dinosaur droppings.  Exhibit D (Me) THEN: When I was a kid I could spend hours drawing cartoons. NOW: Hmmm, never mind that is still what I like to do.  Exhibits E-Z (God)
THEN & NOW: Outside of all the above 'scientific' examples of evolution and in the spiritual realm let's be clear.. our God does not evolve nor does He need to. God is timeless, and so are his truths. Our growingly secular society has chosen to travel down a progressive road of self-enlightenment at 90mph in a Woodstock like hippy van mind set while smoking doobies. While believing they are evolving, and in fact some believe God is evolving/learning. Ironically this 'progressive' world judges fundemental Christians as judgmental, and God's timeless loving truths (The Bible) as outdated needing their tweaking.. BUT in reality truth is ONLY found in our 'never-needing-to-evolve God'. His perfect love and grace are our hope, and He is the solid rock we can count on. Please share this often with this ever changing/evolving tumultuous doubting world. Our God never changes. He is the creator of all things, and the ONLY savior of our souls. IT MATTERS ETERNALLY what we choose to believe, and who we choose to follow. My prayer is for a return to our Christian roots. It is ok to have questions, in fact it is just being honest, BUT don't let your questions become your statements of deconstructing your faith in God. Blessings Jeff (Evolved to being 20 lbs overweight) Larson 10/8/2020 Rich Man, Poor Man 2020A popular saying in the 1980s was "He who dies with the most toys wins." The quote is attributed to flamboyant millionaire Malcolm Forbes. In stark contrast to the advice of Mr. Forbes I recall as a kid in Sunday School learning the story in Mt 19:16-26 where after the dejected rich young ruler leaves Jesus he tells his disciples "it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter Heaven." This was GOOD NEWS for my lower middle classed family and BAD NEWS for those 'blessed with RICHES' living on the other side of the tracks.  AND.. It was clear even to my elementary school understanding of physics no big ol' hairy desert beast of burden will pass through an eye of any needle. I later learned the 'eye of the needle' Jesus was referring to was a small gate in Jerusalem a camel could only pass through if it stooped and had its baggage removed. This is a great analogy of wealth which can be a great blessing and resource for self and others in this life, but.. "you can't take it with you." . So clearly the smirky advice of 'Rich Man' Malcom Forbes (even if true) pales in comparison to 'Poor Man' Jesus words of eternal perspective. But what about me? As a relatively poor man I find myself strangely affected by the thoughts of the Rich Young Ruler. Let me paraphrase Mt 19: 16-22 if I was talking to Jesus. Ok, as I said I am more poor than rich, so how would that conversation look? Jeff: Teacher, what must I do to get eternal life? Jesus: keep the commandments.. don't murder Jeff: CHECK Jesus: don't commit adultery Jeff: CHECK Jesus: don't steal Jeff: CHECK, Jesus: tell the truth Jeff: CHECK Jesus: honor father and mother Jeff: CHECK Jesus: and love your neighbor as yourself Jeff: CHECK. Jeff: {thinking so far so good} Jesus: "Now give yourself totally to me. Give me your time, your leisure, your resources, your thoughts, and trust me when life is good and when it is difficult. Ready?" <insert awkard pause here> Jeff: I thought you were going to ask me about money? Money is ok to give up since I don't have much, but I need my TV time to unwind at night. No more than 3 hours.. and my sports.. let me keep my sports, ok? If Jesus would ever slap his head, and mutter "Oh brother".. It would be after this conversation.  ME ME ME ME FIRST!
I agree with the teaching of the rich young ruler.. but also if honest I am not sure I give myself totally to Jesus. In fact, I know I don't. I have to say honestly that today I am seeking God like never before in my life. I have a rush of passion for Jesus, and pursue him humbly like never before.. BUT .. oh what a wretched sinner I am. I think of my past, my regrets, my SINS, hurt relationships, and know I could have only done better. I think about my present state of exhilaration in pursuing God and feel a bit stuck, and that whatever God calls me to do big or small.. I WILL MESS IT UP. I claim to put God first.. but I have a lot of ME in me. I like, I want, I slip up, and am afraid of messing up my witness, and/or give of my time. BUT I KNOW.. whether a 'Rich Man' or a 'Poor Man' we daily need to say to God I am yours. It will take our daily pursuit of Him (prayer, Bible, and fellowship), and an assertive effort to serve Him. In big or small, whether rich or poor.. all to the Glory of God. My prayer is all of the RICH and POOR folk of God be faithful in the lives we live and the resources we are blessed with. May we all be about the business of sharing Jesus to a world that is lost as 'One body, many parts'.. God bless y'all! Jeff (relatively poor and content) Larson |
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Back Pew - Draw Close to God
116 pages of cartoons of 'Clean Humor & God's Truth' CRITICS ARE SAYING..
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©2019 Jeff Larson - All Rights Reserved
10/31/2020
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