A Beautiful Mess

​My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory.  For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing comes into your assembly, and a poor man in shabby clothing also comes in, and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, “You sit here in a good place,” while you say to the poor man, “You stand over there,” or, “Sit down at my feet,”  James 2:2-3

 James 2:2-3 This is how it looks for me in Minnesota-->

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Let me start by sharing my wife and I attend a church that we really like.  It is a friendly congregation represented by all age groups.  The worship music is well done, and the preaching is straight from God's word in a manner that is both challenging and easy to listen to. The people are friendly and welcoming even in this season of all things COVID-19. 

Next, let me share I am over 5 years sober now after it became apparent I was an alcoholic where drink was becoming a growing compromise in my life (off and on)  for about the previous 15 years.  It did not ruin life, but I was headed on the wrong road, and my addiction to a buzz was growing and dangerous.  I thank God for his healing in this area and for the love and grace of my family.. especially my wife... and of course my God.

I never did attend a recovery program until about a year ago when I attended a Celebrate Recovery program for a few weeks to see if it was right for me at this point in my recovery.

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Well, in contrast to my 'good church' where the worship, preaching, and presentation on Sunday's is clean and sharp.. this Celebrate Recovery program is messy. 

These are people who are struggling.  Some have been sober for 15+ years, others are celebrating not have a drink for 30 days, or less.  Some are people who have been in and out of treatment, and/or suffering the consequences of their addictions by losing their drivers license, jobs, or family. Stories of jail-time, and restraining orders were common.  Many were in the place where they were not drinking but now dealing with the void in their lives where once was a buzz.  This group is a mess, but .. a Beautiful Mess

​What makes this group such a beautiful mess is their journey starts and ends with a return to God. Not just a 'higher power' but the only true power, the God of our Bibles. This is our only hope for the alcoholic and ALL of the rest of humanity (aka sinners).

Life not so long ago..
Now after 5+ years of being sober, I look back on my journey to where I am now.  I did not realize what a fragile mess I was.

• I went bankrupt, 
• The IRS went after me for back taxes
• I had to sell my home and my business and start over. 
• I was wounded deeply and felt a void of what do I replace the buzz of alcohol with.
• I lashed out at family members and though I apologized it caused a wound that has taken time to heal.
  
  note: I was a Christian through all this, I prayed & read my Bible, but was a mess.  Maybe God saw me as a beautiful mess. I think my wife saw me that way.  I was a mess but oh how important I was to her and how much she believed in me and loved me.

So this all makes me reflect on James 2:1-2.  I am ashamed to say I honestly don't like the mess or messy people. I like happy Christians with no deep dark secrets and/or sins. I like the well orchestrated church service and an attractive congregation that looks like .. church people should look? I don't know if I want my church to be messy, even a beautiful mess.

So here I am convicted, and I thank God for this conviction. I now desire to be in the mess, and I will blend nicely as I am a mess. Together we love and support each other. Where one hurts all hurt, and when all rejoice we rejoice together (1 Cor 12:26). 

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God desires to RESTORE US to become the healthy body of Christ. After church I don't want to be the guy looking past the guy or gal out of place to find my usual friends where I am comfortable. I don't know exactly how this conviction on my heart will play out, but I pray God would speak to me and change me to serve him among the beautiful mess that are the people Jesus would be spending his time with.

May God bless you, care for you today, and use you to serve Him in this very messy world. I pray for revival and restoration in our chaotic 2020 America. I pray His church is sensitive and caring for the beautiful mess inside and outside our church walls.

​Jeff (plenty messy still) Larson

note: Recovery is not just for the alcoholic, it is for everyone that struggles with the very real issues of life. Depression, co-dependency, anger, sex addiction, anxiety/fear, etc. I pray we allow ourselves to be honest, and allow God to restore us from what ever has compromised our lives.

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