I
SAMUEL
The book of SAMUEL begins with
1:12-16 the suspicion
Hannah had you been drinking in the Lord's house. Next we learn
2:11-17 Eli has a couple bad apples for sons. This is followed by the story of
3 Eli and restless Samuel , that SAM I AM I do like that SAM I AM.
4:14-18 Eli learns the BAD news about his sons,
5:1-5 That doggone Dagon fish idol of the Phillistines is broken, and the Phillistines decide to
5 & 6 Overnight the Ark!!
SAUL - The first king of Israel.. he stood
9: Head and shoulders above
the rest he was
10:15-16 annointed and declared 13: king at age 30!!
13:22 Saul's first army was not so very impressive.. but later he
14:18-20 battles the Philistines and other wicked kings like
15:7 King Agag . Though annointed by God
15:14 Saul disobeys Samuel and God which was the begining of the end for Saul's reign as first King of Israel.
DAVID & GOLIATH
Next we are introduced to Shepherd boy David 16:14-23 who plays the blues harp? to soothe the tormented mind of King Saul.
Next enters a Giant Problem for Israel... as Goliath enters the scene 17- with a song? followed by more traditional Giant banter of
17:4 Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum!! This of course
17:11 scared Saul, Israel, and most visibly..
Fred . In response to Goliath's taunts you could hear
17:24 Israel shout out a Monty Python like battle cry RUN AWAY!! RUN AWAY!!
So again the harp playing shepherd boy David enters the scene and explains to King Saul he has killed
17:34-37 Lions, 'Tigers?' and Bears..
oh my!
and no Giant should be allowed to trash talk our God.
Saul is reluctanctly convinced to send a boy to do an ARMY'S job equipping him with
17:38-39 Saul's hand me downs which came from the
17:38-39 big and tall section of the armor rack.
The Thrilla' in Pallestinia
So the battle is on!! David with a little 17ish 'dirty hairy' like trash talk puts Goliath in his place. This all sets the stage for the a number of cartoons that capture this epic battle.. In a flash the battle was over, but not before Goliath uttered his 17 Famous last words .. "Hey be careful with those rocks.. someone could get hurt!" Shortly after those words the last keen observation was made with
17:49a Yep.. It's a Rock (one perspective). Moral of the story
17:49a Pride goeth before a fall! , and the simple Excedrin Math Equation becomes
17:49b Brain + Rock = Headache!! All this to say
17:49 Goliath should have called in for a Sick Days
After the battle the CSI Palestine was brought in to determine the cause of death as the rumor that a shepherd boy killed the Phillistine champion Goliath was hard to accept.
THE UNTOLD STORY of Goliath from the Phillistine perspective was Goliath was an unrealized sports career , or an even less known passion of Goliath to be a DANCER
In the aftermath of this GIANT KILLING everyone was 18:7-9
singing the praises of David which did not set well with King Saul. Leading to not 18:10-11 ONE, but 19:10 TWO slip of the spear moments (as Saul liked to call them), and he even tried to make the same 20:24-43 POINT with his own son Jonathan. In retaliation 24:3-5 David alters Saul's robe
So as the first book of Samuel comes to a close 25:9-11 Nabul mocks David
and 28 Saul sees witch of Endor . Of course much more than that happens but that's all the BP toons for now for I Samuel.
II SAMUEL
4:12
Pool Closing?
11:2 King David from the
palace roof.. falls
11:14-17 Uriah to the frontlines
JOAB
20:8-10 Joab kills Amassa
20:22 Heads roll
23:8-12 David's Mighty Warriors
David and his boy Solomon
- Nerd, - Brainiac
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